I’m so thankful that even in my darkest moments, the Lord is faithful to bring me out and allow me to recognize His goodness. It took that hard week to get me to a place where I was willing to do what I needed to deal with my debilitating disease.
My wonderful trainer has been wanting me to start taking an anabolic steroid called Anavar. He has seen it help a lot of people with muscle-weakning diseases such as AIDS, M.S., and so on. I had been very hesitant as I don’t like taking things and putting stuff in my body that I don’t have to. I was at the point where I was willing to do anything. He also asked if I had been taking the creatine supplement he recommended. I had stopped for like 8-10 weeks only for the reason that I had gotten out of the habit. This also had played a big role in my strength decline. The next day I started taking both.
Within a few days, I began to feel a dramatic difference. I have gained 5 pounds in two weeks, have more energy, and have increased the weights during my sessions. We have seen big improvements and are greatly encouraged. I haven’t been able to gain weight for seven years. I was down to 91 pounds and really need to be up to 105. I have a muscle wasting disease, so it is crucial that I work out to build muscle, eat, and stay on top of my weight. For all of you who are saying you’d gladly give me your “weight”…trust me, I wish you could. It’s not fun.
I see my Neurologist at UCLA on Wednesday. Please pray that they would have direction and some answers. At my last appointment, they wanted to do a complete gene panel on me. We are open to this if they are willing to grant it. It has been a long and exhausting road with no real answers in sight. I’m learning to trust God and be patient that He will reveal those answers in time. Right now, I’m praising the Lord for His goodness and my renewed hope to not let this disease win and get the best of me.
I need to be that example for Noah as he prepares to endure his own battle. I don’t ever want to see him give up. I want Noah to rely on his Savior for strength during those hard days. We can do all things through Christ who gives us strength.